Cantrip Love

A DnD-based romantic comedy that will steal your heart. Another Reddit-approved parody.*

Burned out from a string of unsuccessful campaigns, the gnome rogue Shank finds himself in a bustling city, picking pockets for a decent meal. After his fingers slipped into the clothes of the wrong woman, he’s coerced into an agreement to steal a pair of legendary artifacts—a Stormgirdle and Horn of Blasting—from a local warlord’s dominatrix. Making matters worse, he’s being forced to pull off the caper with a human bard with less charisma than an orc (sorry orcs)—Tad Aufki.

Because life is uninteresting unless there is more on somebody’s plate than they can reasonably handle, this story also includes a harem of seductive, backstabbing barmaids targeting the wondrous items. And they’re more than willing to kill whoever gets in their way—including our witless heroes. Despite Shank and Tad’s precarious entanglements, they’re destined to find love in the most unlikely of places. Join them on their amorous adventure in CANTRIP LOVE… complete with horrendous cover art!

*Seriously, what is even happening over there?

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Trigger Warnings
Significant: –
Moderate: bullying, death, physical violence, profanity, sexual content, war
Mild: gore, abduction
Implied: –